I stared at the ember

Till sleep came to seize me

The ember still glowing

Stubbornly flickering

We bade at each other, reassuring—

“Have faith in me.“

My hope is that as you open your heart and mind to new possibilities, as you become MINDFUL of feeding the “good wolf” in you. The good that is in you. The GOOD that is YOU.

Standing where the light took me. Standing in my strength. Standing in my truth and power. I am slowly taking back control of my life. Where did all this beauty come from? A different path, a new journey awaits. Albeit all the unknowns, there is the certainty of a promising future.

As I learn to find solace in that rock bottom, I am finding the beauty—how my heart feels, how my mind overthinks, how my Soul refuses to be tempered. In the spirit of love and forgiveness, I am also learning to reclaim my power back. Just looking at the beauty of that deep valley in my mind, I know this place serves a purpose.

Cast your cares, you tender being

Cast your heart and hear it beating

Cast your mind and know you’re willing

Cast your soul and find yourself conquering

SPIRIT AWARD- teamwork. My mind, body, and soul have to be aligned with my real life’s purpose. Team-spirit- the energy I have to put out into the world to make my life’s work come to full fruition. That’s the work I needed to do. Give it a try! This time, you’ll make it.

I long for that world again, where you can just play with your friends.

Safe.

Unencumbered.

Free.

Joyful.

A world where you can live life wholeheartedly.

Living easily in the Present.

Launching yourself on every wave.

Dancing in the middle of nowhere freely in any tune.

Ragged.

Tired.

Exhausted.

But free...and safe.

I’m hoping that when things settle down, I can still find the comfort that this Southern country store offered during my kids’ growing years. That it will be there waiting for us with the rocking chairs waiting upfront, the scent of childhood candies and scented candles in the front store, the cozy wood-burning fireplace, the hustle and bustle to serve the best comfort food in this part of our world, and the lovely southern voice that comes with hospitality.

And so you show up into the world with your head held high and say: “You’ve seen my descent. Now watch my rising” (Rumi). 

Keep on reaching out. Focus on your strength. Focus on your love. Know that there will always be another hand reaching out to pull you out from whatever you are stuck on. And remember how blessed you are to be alive.

I look forward to the future. I look forward to the day where happiness no longer hides behind the mask of pain. I look forward to the day where mental health isn't stigmatized, but instead, openly talked about. I look forward to the day where people can be proud of themselves for living. I look forward to the day where everyone loves themselves regardless of flaws or imperfections. I hope I get to live long enough to find a world that looks like this. But for now, I’m simply happy to be alive. 

Sometimes you connect with a beautiful soul that in them you find Hope— that glimmer of light in a world where you’re grappling on things that no longer serve you. A solid presence that brings you to your knees and say, “Thank you!” Thank you for showing up in my life.

With every step I take I see you there warmly embracing the change.

You show me how to live life fully.

You teach me things I never knew.

Your insights inspire me to walk on my journey with you.

Unconditional love goes beyond all words,

even perceived limitations,

and is felt in the heart.

This is my own understanding…

…of unconditional love.

Feeling life flood my being.

I am alive.

Rejuvenated

By mother nature’s nourishing touch,

I am grateful

For all she provides.

I always thought I would be doing the Camino to heal. I went there with cracks wide open. The Camino broke me pretty hard. And when I reached Santiago, to offer my broken pieces, they were grounded into smaller, grain of sand pieces. Spirit’s way of saying, “How about we start all over again?”